Woman in her Personality


Well l have been reading a book by Beverly LaHaye The Spirit Controlled Woman. It talks on how God has wired each one of us and how that also contributes to our purpose and our walk with Him. I thought personalities are just someone’s theory until l critically did a survey on my self only to realize the way my personality is also has alot of effect in the way God reaches out to me and how l respond to things.

I am a Mel&Sag. So my Mel is the dominating very analytical, introverted and deep reflector. I love reading books.
Let me share a something, l used to wonder this God that speaks loud in an audible voice to others why does He also not do the same to me, why can’t l hear Him. I decided to pray and search and one day l remember God asking me do you understand why l have wired you the way l do do you understand the strengths l have given you are also my channels that l communicate to you through, do you understand also your strengths are annointings that l have placed in your life.

Woo!! Okay let me explain most Mel are deep reflectors they read alot so l realized when am studying reading books God speaks to me alot, ideas come thoughts and insights. I also realized since l write alot when l sit down to jot inspiration just comes and l put ideas thoughts into writing articles or blog. Well l also realized each season am in whenever l need wisdom on something God always directs me into a book His Word or a written book by a certain author and when l follow l get the answer right on.

The day l got this l don’t struggle l just got the knowledge on How God relates to me and became content so l guard my books and my space jealously. Most people don’t really know my introvert part but it doesn’t mean we don’t socialize it means we usually can’t stay long in gatherings we retrieve to breathe we like quietness we don’t understand noise and we love our space for in those spaces and quietness we hear Him well. I don’t limit God He can choose to use wider channels but l choose to understand. How many of you understand yourself? How many of you beautiful women know yourself.

I encourage you do a study on how God wired you so  that you can learn also how to relate to others and have healthy relationships. Most of the inner and outer conflicts that we have if you look keenly are as a result of one not having enough knowledge of who you are and why you respond and react to situations the way you do.


Knowing your personality is not a theory that was just invented its a study to help you understand yourself and allow the Holy Spirit to influence who you are and use your strengths and skills to build others and for His Kingdom advancement.

Knowing myself has helped me so much to relate to others effectively handle conflicts more maturely and understand others and how to relate with them. I feel my relationships are more constructive and with a deeper meaning and more enriching and fulfilling. Knowing myself has helped me also in my personal walk with God.







Overcoming Heartache!


Nehemiah 2:17.Then I said to them, “You see the bad situation that we are in—how Jerusalem is desolate and lies in ruins and its gates have been burned with fire. Come, and let us rebuild the wall of Jerusalem, so that we will no longer be a disgrace.

The story of Nehemiah reminds me of the many times we have experienced different brokenness in our lives. Heartbreaks that brought ruins in your life, that left you feeling desolate. I was reviewing my life and l realized a pattern of cycles that have been taking place since l never completely dealt with the issues or focused on rebuilding the foundation again. I thought carpeting things is better l thought ignoring is even a better antidote. It is tempting to look at the shambles of your brokenness and feel weary, utterly hopeless, with no signs of healing in sight. The thought of reconstructing your life is enough to make you want to go to bed, You dont want to forge forward.

The truth is if you dont’ go back to rebuild back your foundations the cycles will repeat themselves again in different forms and shape. You have to make a choice, to be determined to forge forward beyond pain in your life. I want to share practical examples that l have applied and still do in my life that have helped me overcome heartache.

Pick the pieces :  Nehemiah used some of the stones that had been shattered and charred. They discerned what they could use and threw away the rest. There is still usable substance from your past experience. Those pieces when breathed by the breath of God again they will give meaning to your life. Each piece that was ruined, it may be your self esteem, your capacity to love, your kindness, you experienced rejection . God is going to show you something about each one, He will show you how it was mishandled, how it was left open to attack. He will show you the beauty of each one, and reveal His word and will concerning every of the piece in your life.

Let the Lord reveal your mistakes: As you begin to think about the whole situation upsets will come .Your contrition (remorseful) might be great as you review your mistakes. The wounds will open afresh, allow those tears to cleanse you, but don’t let them dampen your spirit.  Be willing to examine your self and take responsibility of your own mistakes.

Feed spiritually, physically: You must erase every lie of the enemy and replace each one with God’s words truth. Forget what everybody else thinks. What does God think of you? What does He desire for your life? Have a direct promise from God to you and walk in it.Eat take care of yourself- when your immune is not okay it will affect your health and you will not be able to persevere. You have greater capacity to overcome when you are healthy.

Rest: purify yourself and get rid of anything that will displease the Lord and rob you of your restoration- negative associates, little unnecessary comments, imaginations and habits that can stop the flow of blessings. Stop striving, stop working to make things happen and rest in Him. Don’t use the calendar to measure your progress. God is not in a hurry when it comes to the healing process. Take it one day at a time.

Silence: What does one do in the silence after the storm?  There comes a time after releasing all when you must let sleeping dogs lie. Don’t talk about it anymore. Don’t allow others to talk about it either. The devil will always send someone in the name of comfort to keep you stuck in the same spot. Practice silence.  During this time is when God speaks and comes with loving instructions on where to go from here.

Do not be afraid to take steps towards healing and overcoming. Nehemiah as they were rebuilding the wall they were also afraid at some point but they kept forging forward pressing on not looking back or barking down

Nehemiah 4:14: When I saw their fear, I stood and said to the nobles and officials and the rest of the people: “Do not be afraid of them; [confidently] remember the Lord who is great and awesome, and [with courage from Him] fight for your brothers, your sons, your daughters, your wives, and for your homes.”






1 Corinthians 6:18 Run away from sexual immorality [in any form, whether thought or behavior, whether visual or written]. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the one who is sexually immoral sins against his own body.

In this time and age walking in purity has proven to be difficult not because you cant its because the definition of purity to you is not well defined. You dont know why you have to walk in purity or its importance. When you dont know the real purpose of something you are not well motivated to walk in it. We have systems surrounding us  that each day they declare purity just for some and not for others or rendered not important in anyway.

We have accepted the norm that you can just do what you have to do you will be forgiven and life moves. We forget their CONSEQUENCES.

The reason you should walk in purity is

  1. The fear of God: This should be your motivation not anything else. You walk in purity because you honor God with your body because He is Holy and your body is a living sacrifice to Him which should be Holy and acceptable as a pleasing sacrifice.
  2. Blameless: probably you have never thought of this you should be walked down that aisle to be presented blameless before the presence of God. l know right now everyone can walk down the aisle the way they feel like with protruding tummy or having committed sexual sin God can never be mocked His principles are serious and He doesn’t change them to accommodate your weaknesses, you will be disciplined even after forgiveness.
  3. Foundation: You dont want an unstable foundation for your life sexual sin builds unstable foundation, a shaky one for that matter. It opens doors for attacks creates loop holes , you keep fighting battles that you are not suppose to fight, since you gave the way.

I want to speak to you form the depth of my heart when you give yourself to someone in sex you are literally giving them ownership over your life, you are sealing a blood covenant you carry the virtue of that person in you.That person releases their strength in you. You are giving someone responsibility over your life , your uncovering your entire life to them.

SEX withing marriage was for the purpose of covenant so that this man can take the responsibility to develop you to help you fulfill your purpose.When you have SEX before marriage you are cutting off God’s providence of strength in your life. The strength includes unity, peace, rest, advancement.

You should be vulnerable enough to someone who will empower you that is God ordained for you. Allowing your self to have SEX before marriage is cutting off your purpose and destiny it takes time to recover.

How do you walk in purity .

  1. Be modest : when you show off your cleavage your part of the body you attract the wrong men in your life. You attract lustful men, your positioning yourself where you want to be known body wise and not after your purpose. You are literally uncovering yourself and exposing yourself  which will lead to you being mishandled.You are exposing yourself to irresponsible people who dont see purpose but the bed.
  2. Eyes:  Your eyes are the gateway to your mind and heart what do you watch what do you look at? I want to encourage you whatever you watch the series we watch they have a tendency of provoking your mind thoughts and body to a certain direction. They influence our behaviors and actions. Am not ashamed  to say l dont watch programs that insinuate sex, divorce, homosexuality or any other that mock God.By God’s grace l have been able to restrain and my level of walking in purity totally improved l dont have a TV in my house for this very purpose, if it was making me fall why not get rid of it. I honor God than pleasure and comfort.

God is not asking you to walk in purity or asking you to try He is commanding you, through His grace for He knows in it their is life. Walking in purity is a sacrifice it’s never easy you have to be determined and make a deliberate decision.

Don’t be ashamed to walk in purity. don’t compromise, let people call you old fashioned but you are building a strong foundation for your generation unshakable one and altar for God where your off spring shall worship without measure.

I want to finish with this if it already happened, you had sex before marriage God is so faithful so merciful , He even says as far as the east is from the west so far as He removed our transgressions from us.You can begin again you can start again, if you confess your sins He is just and faithful to forgive you.




Resilience to Rebuild

anneHebrews 10:39 Amplified Bible (AMP) But our way is not that of those who shrink back to destruction, but [we are] of those who believe [relying on God through faith in Jesus Christ, the Messiah] and by this confident faith preserve the soul.

Last week we talked about the blessings of a breakup and l felt the need to share on how to rebuild back. How do you overcome and move on. What does it take.

It takes FAITH it takes holding on to the one that is the author and finisher of your faith. One of the things that l have learnt through heart breaks is the tendency of feeling hopeless. Feeling like no one cares which ultimately can lead to depression.You have to  be resilient you have to wake up you have to decide to get over and rebuild through God’s strength.

From my experience l want to share some practical examples that have helped me.

  1. Evaluate yourself- Be kind to yourself, abstain from feeling guilty or you were never good enough, forgive yourself, the desire to feel like you could have done better can eat you up and put you in a den. Stick to the positives by this l mean there are absolutely things that you did better and excelled on.Build a castle on that and refuse to feel negative about yourself. When you evaluate yourself do it so that you can purpose to improve and become more like Christ. As you evaluate yourself it will be coming into confrontation with your weaknesses and fears draw the good the essential the valuable like you draw honey from the bee hive and choose to grow and become better in the midst of those failures.
  2. The Voice of God. This is the voice of the truth that brings healing to your life and wrecked soul. This voice has to supersede the negative one in your current situation. What does God say about your situation? what is His view? Find out and stick to it. This is the voice that will help you get through that will help you see yourself beyond the negativity around you. Whatever He says stick to it.
  3. Disconnections. This is always difficult and it is what breeds cycles. You still have the particulars of this person around you. Now you got to love yourself enough to get rid of any hindrance. Hebrews 12:1-2 Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses , stripping off every unnecessary weight and the sin which so easily and cleverly entangles us, let us run with endurance and active persistence the race that is set before us, [looking away from all that will distract us and] focusing our eyes on Jesus, who is the Author and perfecter of Faith who for the joy [of accomplishing the goal] set before Him endured the cross, disregarding the shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God [revealing His deity, His authority, and the completion of His work]. Get rid of all everything that reminds you of this past if it will mean isolation for sometimes so be it. You got to fight for your restoration wholeness. Love yourself enough with this in perspective its your destiny at stake here and God’s purpose for your life has be fulfilled. Don’t allow procrastination or to be lured by the enemy with other set ups. Press on.

In all this God will walk with you He will comfort you and strengthen you. But you have to take progressive steps that He asks of you day by day. God is never in a hurry with a healing process for He is more concerned in forming character building a firm foundation in you so that you can resist the temptation of going backwards again.

Philippians 2:13 Amplified Bible (AMP)For it is [not your strength, but it is] [a]God who is effectively at work in you, both to will and to work [that is, strengthening, energizing, and creating in you the longing and the ability to fulfill your purpose] for His good pleasure.

Blessings of a BREAKUP!

anneThe past season of my life has truly been one of reflection over and over again. Have you ever made a decision in your life that you thought would be a sail in the ocean then all breaks loose. Your Spirit goes low you wonder whether it was right whether you obeyed God whether you went to fast. We have all been in relationships but for one reason or another we stepped aside it may have been the person was abusive, they were not adding value in your life, or it was compromising your faith and walk in God. Whatever reason it was it is never easy at times to bounce back, it takes resilience and courage to press on even when it looks like you are going under than higher. Never doubt the sovereignty of God and His plan for your life. He is very much in control and He will never leave you in moments of weakness.

2 Corinthians 12:9  but He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you [My loving kindness and My mercy are more than enough—always available—regardless of the situation]; for [My] power is being perfected [and is completed and shows itself most effectively] in [your] weakness.”Therefore, I will all the more gladly boast in my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ [may completely enfold me and] may dwell in me.

Lets get a bit deeper in this as per my title, Romans 8:28 Amplified Bible (AMP)And we know [with great confidence] that God [who is deeply concerned about us] causes all things to work together [as a plan] for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to His plan and purpose.

Every negativity as long us it is in the plan of God has a blessing attached to it. The break up most of the times it’s God realigning you, setting you apart to connect you to that which is His will for you. To the right person, to the right environment to the right destiny.

The process of healing may be painful, but be patient l always put it this way God is putting you through  a DETOX! program, to empty you from the past from the soul ties, from the emotional baggage, so He can fill you with fresh love, to rebuild your foundations that were shaken as a result  of the wrong connection.

If you stay with God you will never be the same again, their are blessings that come from a break up, that you can only see them through the spiritual eyes. That is why you need God to give you His perspective to see the riches of His love and vastness of His plan for your life. God makes up, l always say break ups are a wake up call from God speaking l have a better plan greater than what you were trying to settle in.

Break up’s are a wake up call that you are more valuable, you deserve to be valued more, your worth is extraordinary and so is your destiny. They bring to light that the person who you were with probably does not have the capacity to handle your heart they are not mature enough to see purpose in you they are seeing nakedness. God is literally telling you through a break up l need someone who can develop you and define your purpose. You are first a vessel as a vessel there is treasure in you.

The breakup is a blessing in disguise wait patiently.

Woman of Purity

Titus 2:11-12

For the [remarkable, undeserved] grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. It teaches us to reject ungodliness and worldly (immoral) desires, and to live sensible, upright, and godly lives [lives with a purpose that reflect spiritual maturity] in this present age,I don’t know why you choose to walk in sexual purity, what’s your motivation, sometimes l think people do it since they fear being told they are sinners or you will get pregnant or you will get a disease, why do you walk in purity why wait for sex till you get married. I read an article by Ernest Wamboye which inspired me.

The first reason why believers should wait for sexual activity until marriage is to remember why you were called. Why did you choose to have a relationship with Christ? Christ Jesus is the ultimate incentive, to wait until marriage. If I truly understand what Jesus did on that cross for me, then there really is nothing he cannot ask of me. And if he asks for my sexual purity, then his sacrifice for me melts my heart in obedience to him. Sexual purity becomes a joy to live and not a struggle to endure. If I disregard his request for my sexual purity then I only prove two things:  that He is not lord of my life, and that his death is worthless in my eyes. And if that is true, it is difficult to know if you belong to him or not. And when you grasp that, beloved, it melts your hearts to wait; it does not scare you with statistics on disease. When you grasp that, beloved, it stops you from asking questions such as “how far is too far.” Your concern ceases being how close I can get to the sin boundary. Your concern becomes how much I can know Christ.

If your Lord is Christ Jesus and if he is your Saviour and not just your moral example, you know that your authority is spelled Y-A-H-W-E-H! Your salvation is not based on your hold on Christ but on Christ’s hold on you that never fails. Christ will uphold any believer who seeks purity with all their heart even in the midst of a perverse generation. The world’s authority is spelled “everyone is entitled to their opinion.” As a believer you are entitled to God’s word and not your opinion.


woman in waiting


Waiting is one of the most important virtue you can ever possess if you had knowledge on its importance.

At times women find a waiting period as torture, actually if it extends to more than the period they wanted it’s concluded as a night mare.

It not easy to wait you get anxious thoughts, other days are better than others, but what gives you the joy of waiting is the assurance of who you are in God, your identity is totally rooted in Him, and your heart assured of His promises, which He is Faithful to fulfill.

You can only wait as long and as much when your waiting period is well defined and you have well defined goals to help you not settle for less than God has for you.

You will settle for anything at any time when you don’t know what you want and no defined vision of what you would like your relationship /marriage to look like.

Understand that the waiting period is preparation for your purpose not just to have a man figure filling a void in your life. You are being prepared to be an effective, efficient helpmate.

This is a season for you to develop your strengths and weaknesses, YOU’RE a HELP-MET. God has placed multiple unique significant gifts inside of you to HELP your man to fulfill everything that God has called him to do.

This is a season for you to develop your relationship with God, Meditate on His word. Your physical relationship with the man is as strong as your relationship with God, because it’s out of this relationship you know how to connect, how to love, how to respond. You will need insight, wisdom, and knowledge on how to help the man fulfill his purpose.

God will bring you into the presence of the right man when your desperation changes to a desire that is, waiting for fulfillment at the right time. When you are fully prepared God will present you, you don’t determine when and how He does it.